Home Diaries Turning the pages of my life: Story of 2019

Turning the pages of my life: Story of 2019


Hello, Friendly Reminder!

As the year is ending people are going to share their elaborative achievement on social media which is great and all but having said that my achievement this year was only getting through this year. I know it cannot be considered as the achievement! But for those who have ceased their life this year, stepping to another year has to be beautiful achievement and so as to me. Because this year was horrendous nightmare that I don’t even want to summon back.

I commenced this year with functional dyspepsia which became so severe that I was completely confined to bed for six long months. I know six months sound short but for me, it felt like six long years.I went through long dark six months without knowing what was drowning me. I survived only on liquids because any tidbit I intake would be thrown up. There were days when I doubted myself if I could see tomorrow’s light or not, but my farewell never ended. I had more dots of needles on my hand than I could imagine. I don’t remember the count on the number of doctors and hospitals I visited before I settled on one who actually diagnosed what it was. I started my medication, which I am still in and probably have to be under till my very last(according to doctor), but soon after my medication I turned out to be of considerable size; nearly 15 kg up which actually showed most on my face. My brother mocked me “you look like a fat fairy from tinkerbell”. But I took that more as a compliment than a ridicule because at least he considered me as a fairy. It took me quite a long time to get used to medication and to get things back to normal. I am in my midst of my nightmare but the good news is that it actually doesn’t feel terrible. It just feels hard and I have a long way to go but it’s also far from over.

This is a synopsis or a minute tinge of what made my 2019 so worst but this year also made me understand what actually “Health is wealth” meant. Now I strictly take care of my diet and not to forget I exercise every day and I also joined gym for few month. It is correctly said that if the worst ever came to pass, you are likely to become the stronger and better version of yourself. But there are also things this year made me experience which I was longing for. I know it is an insane want but I always wanted to know what it feels like to be admitted in a hospital. There is also something more that I am delighted i.e. my one month low carb diet (beginning of my medication). I absolutely loved my three time egg and chicken diet. But what made my 2019 has to be the Avengers, End game, Joker, Money Heist, Chernobyl, parasite not that stupid game of throne that single handedly ruined everything.

Basically, to say, this one year for me felt like three year which is now about to end. But I have also known that the future may unfurl it in an unexpected way and you are always going to learn something or the other even in your worst nightmare. Life is hard but it is short too. Turn that chink in your armor into beautiful ornament. I believe in you and I believe in me too.

  • Sadhana Thapa